Sandy’s Time in France…..
by Pat Chapman
Since Sandy and I only met in 2005, I don’t have the richness of history that family members and other friends might have. However, when you meet someone new in your 60’s you often share stories as part of creating a new friendship. So I know many stories of Matt and Jef, stories of Sandy’s days at Oak Park and her special relationship with the students in the science fiction club (you learn that story automatically if you try to establish skype contact with Sandy and see her interesting sign on name!) and even stories of taking the bus to Pomona College or grad school in Cambridge. Those stories are all part of knowing Sandy. But Sandy and I shared, with a group of other women, a special bond. At a time when all our friends were quite settled in their lives with more than enough activities to keep them busy, we were thrown into a new world of living in France. And not the typical story of couples finding and restoring a house in Provence and being charmed by all the quirky workmen. No, this group of independent women were following their husbands to work at CERN – leaving behind all things and language familiar. In essence, we were returning to a life very similar to graduate school days. We first started getting together for the occasional afternoon of coffee and swapping “Survivor- type” stories. As more and more women arrived, we decided we needed a name. Our first choice – after much discussion – was American Women of the Jura – or AWOJ. Not exactly an acronym that rolls off your lips! Sandy took a large role in organizing us into a cohesive group and I believe even suggested our new name – CREW – CERN Relocated English Speaking Women. When I speak of Sandy today I am really speaking for each of them – several have even sent me anecdotes or “Sandy stories” to include.
Sandy approached living in France just as she did everything else in life – with gusto, determination, and sheer strength of spirit. There was no task too daunting – from arranging for the delivery of fuel oil – which you had to go to the wine store to do – don’t ask! – to tracking down the best place for insurance, to sure fire ways to get rid of the fouines, a sort of stone martin who lives in the Jura Mountains whose main staple of food seems to be rubber hoses in cars, particularly American cars. And remember, all these tasks had to be undertaken in French. Speaking with trades people can be daunting when you speak their language, imagine when you don’t. And Sandy had many tales of showing up ready for this discussion only to realize they were closed from 12-2, that the one person who could speak some English was on vacation, none of this stopped her. She just would return, more determined than ever, and didn’t leave until she was sure she was understood AND the oil would be delivered!
Sandy and I had 2 French classes a week together. The teacher was always giving us assignments that she felt would broaden our conversational skills – even though they might be vocabulary we would NEVER use again. Usually the presentations were about an hour – or one class. Sandy decided she would talk about Religion in America – you know, that simple topic. She came with so much information and so many handouts I think she actually spoke for 4 periods!! Our classmates were intrigued at the sheer number of religions in America as well as the way it was so openly discussed particularly in regards to politics. Sandy and I gave a join presentation of the Primary Process – another easy topic, right. We were like two junior high school students meeting together, planning who would say what, making charts and graphs……and translating it all into French. Two former teachers giving a presentation! But I had my preconceptions about the differences between high school and elementary school teachers totally reinforced. Sandy wanted to make sure the charts were all exact, that the translations were accurate, that the subjunctive was used correctly….that’s the high school teacher. I just wanted them to have fun with the political cartoons and colorful handouts and know why Obama was best, and be happy…that’s the elementary teacher. In other words we made quite a good team!
J. and I also shared an unusual living circumstance with the Prices. The house they rented had a 3rd floor studio apt. with a loft that was unused. When housing, particularly for short term visitors was becoming difficult Sandy asked the proprietor is she’d be willing to rent out this apt. She agreed and the “Best Price B & B” was born. J. moved in personal items and this became his apt. Sandy always graciously washed the towels so they were fresh each time J. arrived and she even had milk and eggs waiting for him. This provided us with many opportunities for visiting, walking and exploring.
Sandy’s love of all things French was particularly evident in her involvement in our small town. She went to the Armistice Day celebrations and the ceremonial wine toast afterwards, she and Larry attended the equivalent of the City Council meetings, we went to evening concerts of the local multi-aged orchestra where we would be the only Americans there, we even went to what turned out to be a Senior Citizens gardening lecture about “safe gardening techniques”. Just another opportunity to practice her French! There was a book published about the history of Thoiry called” Si Thoiry nous était conté” which Anita translated as “If Thoiry were to tell you her tales”. Sandy loved this book and seeing the pictures of the home she and Larry rented when it was originally the mill in town. She read all the details and would go off looking for one or another historical site. But – that was not enough. Sandy decided that there needed to be an English translation. Actually I think her first comment was “Why didn’t the author write an English version. It would be a big seller.” Well, she even arranged for our mutual friend, Anita Cautillo, to introduce her to the author. It was clear that while he was happy Sandy liked the book, he had NO intention or writing a translation. So – as you might expect – Sandy decided SHE would translate it. It was a VERY big project but she was relentless. Anita worked to finish the translation and some grammatical corrections and now the English version with a photo of Sandy rests next to the French version in the local library, a permanent remembrance of Sandy’s time in Thoiry.
Sandy would often write up and send out via email one or another of her discoveries or travels or upcoming events like the opening of the wine caves in Switzerland or the Chocolate Fete in Versoix, Switzerland and email to the CREW mailing list. Her notes were always very specific as to costs, parking, hours…….many is the event we would NEVER have attended without Sandy’s encouragement. The Wine Fete in neighboring Gex has probably seen a marked drop in sales since we all left. Although Sandy was not much of a drinker herself, she got a whole group to go annually, eat mussels, drink wine and buy!
Some of Sandy’s “findings” were more significant than others – like when she sent the note that reported that if you ever needed a toilet in a small town, head for the Mairie because if there wasn’t one there, there was one close by. Liz Spalding called it the best advice ever and recently said “We smile and think of her wherever we go”.
Sandy had it as her goal – being a very goal driven person – to visit every departement in France. A departement is sort of like a state – varying in size, but none very big since all of France would fit in about 5 Midwest states. There are 95 departements in all. We laughed as Sandy would decide what constituted “visiting” – putting your foot in, having the train pass through. I think she ended up deciding you just had to pass through. Sandy carefully counted off each departement and colored on her map. She planned short trips and long vacations based on adding a new departement to the list. And she made it to all but about 10. Ellen Taylor was often her companion and navigator on these trips. She said if the French ever decided they were into bumper stickers – something they don’t have now – she and Sandy thought they needed one that said “I brake for Gallo-Roman ruins”.
Sandy’s involvement with the UU Church was very important to her and she wanted to continue that while in France. She was happy to find a small but committed community of UUs who met in Geneva. Sandy and Larry, of course, attended. But attending was not sufficient – this is Sandy remember. She took over organization of the group and began to store all the items needed for a service in a big Rubbermaid tub that rested on her porch, and even went to the expat meeting to set up a booth to encourage new members. Knowing the appeal of chocolate, she asked me to bring back some bags of Hershey kisses. She said that little touch brought many people over to chat – and then she was ready to tell them all about why they’d LOVE attending the UU fellowship as a place to find a community of shared values..
I could go on and on, as I’m sure everyone here could, with “Sandy stories”, but Larry made me promise to keep it “succinct”. As I’m sure everyone would agree, our lives were richer because Sandy crossed our paths. Her “joie de vivre” or joy of life was unique no matter what language you said it in. She is missed………